Something About Myself That I Just Remembered

I once paid for a pack of cigarettes with subway tokens.

An Idle Thought Before I Turn In

I wonder if tonight celebrities are nervous, sleepless; walking about their mansions closing windows and locking doors. If, perhaps, this season of death weighs heavy on their thoughts, the summer long and littered with bodies.

Today I watched a roast of William Shatner in which Farrah Fawcett appeared. It was before the cancer left her ravaged but you could catch the leading edge of something – her arms looked thin, a tinge of desperation as she botched her speech one time, then again, finally lowering her head in uncomfortable laughter. She was having trouble with an errant bra strap and seemed distracted. At one point she said, “I’m not on anything!” exasperated and you wanted to believe her.

When I got home I was looking on YouTube for clips from the roast, but I couldn’t find any. Instead I found a series of commercials Farrah starred in for her line of shampoo. They were soft-focused with horses in fields and dogs on beaches. Her hair was blond and big, her teeth white and somehow very California.

It must be wonderful and terrible to be famous. And to have your own shampoo.

Harem Pants are for Whores

This video, which YouTube has recommended for me, instructs the fashion layperson as to how one should wear harem pants. You know, because this is something we all should know.

Now, I have no real opinion about harem pants, except that they are for whores. Filthy whores, who lay about on pillows mopping jizz stains from their bodices and applying layer upon layer of frosted lipstick. I do, however, have an opinion about motel furniture and depressing bedspreads and, maybe, this little miss should be more attentive to her home and less eager to mention her 22″ waist.

There’s Nothing Chilly About This

WordPress just suggested I name my blog theincorporealchillnail.com. Could someone please tell me what a chillnail is and why I would want to be one?

A Thought That Occurred To Me This Evening, In The Locker Room At The Gym

Now here is a room full of assholes who think their dicks are magic.

This Moment Here

The boredom is like a wave, you have to let it wash over you. Struggle and you’ll drown. Acquiesce, and you float.

I Have Terrible Powers

Whenever I root for someone to win, they lose.